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Another side of Valentine's day

machineplay speaks truth in "Anti-Valentine's Day: Love is not enough" (IMHO), a post inspired by seeing this recent XKCD:

Having been co-dependent from a young age (but now learning not to be) as well as often clinically depressed and sometime suicidal, "love conquers all" is a fallacy that I now know to be untrue, intellectually, but I still struggle to know this on a more intuitive / emotional / visceral level.

machineplay says in the above-linked post what I would not have been able to find the words to say.



( 4 comments — Leave a comment )
Feb. 14th, 2008 01:42 am (UTC)
Right on the money
A person's happiness, or lack thereof, is his or her responsibilty.
Feb. 14th, 2008 02:08 am (UTC)
Re: Right on the money
Just say so carefully to the depressed.

What I mean is responsibility implies choice, when people don't always have them. So sometimes, these pithy little sayings aren't quite all they're crack up to be.

Fundamentally yes, practically, eh.
Feb. 14th, 2008 02:22 am (UTC)
I'd posit that the inability to be happy is sometimes beyond our control, for any number of reasons ranging from sheer lack of practice to stress or grief to chemical imbalance to brain tumor and beyond. That doesn't mean that it's someone else's responsibility. Outside those mitigating factors, our happiness is our responsibility, yes.

That's a really exciting thing because we can learn to find it in so many unexpected places, sometimes even when we are suffering from those other factors. Moreover, most of those factors are ones we can change or treat to some degree if we're privileged enough. All the more reason to talk about it if we are among those who are able to find treatment and education to make us happier people.
(Deleted comment)
Feb. 14th, 2008 11:19 am (UTC)
Re: Right on the money
Oh, I agree. I was just struck by how well machineplay's entry was written and how *true* it was for a lot of my past. YMMV, ofc.
( 4 comments — Leave a comment )


Nat S Ford
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