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Originally posted by natdaylog at 23:10 Trying to calm a panic attack triggered by yelling…

Trying to calm a panic attack triggered by yelling and smashing enough to remember a new password but getting locked out instead. Heart is now racing. Also instant nausea and headache at pc9. :(((

See also this post on my tumblr (copied here for completeness):

When women scream you wonder what’s wrong with them. When men yell you get afraid about what they’re going to do.

'A girl in my creative writing class said this in response to a story we read about witnessing intimate partner violence and it really fucked with my head because I’ve never, ever, ever, thought of it that way.' (via firelorddahlia)



For me, anyway, this is incredibly true, and it’s why I don’t cope with raised voices well. It really upsets me, and I don’t think most men understand that, even if they say they do. I’m not talking about a startle response that gives me a momentary jolt of adrenaline, I’m talking about it triggering a body-wide fight-or-flight response that sometimes leaves me feeling like I’m going to puke. (And it also makes me really, really angry, reflexively, and that’s a really gross combination.)

(Source: frantzfandom, via naamahdarling)


( 4 comments — Leave a comment )
Apr. 23rd, 2014 09:17 pm (UTC)
Wow. I'd never thought of it that way either, but yeah. That sounds really true.

Hearing people raise voices makes me very uncomfortable, because I still remember the last time I yelled at someone. It was fifteen years ago (I was 14), and it scared me to realise how good it felt: I was yelling, I felt powerful, I felt I had crossed some kind of limit and it was my turn to impose my will and to stomp my foot... and then the last thing I knew was that my little brother was crying with shock because I'd yelled at him so much.

It was really sobering to realise how good it can feel, when you're basically busy hurting someone else to get on your power trip. I've never yelled at anyone again, but when I see people raise their voices, part of me knows that there's a big chance that at this very moment, they're just making themselves feel better through verbal violence. And it's really scary.
Apr. 23rd, 2014 10:08 pm (UTC)
Yeah. This person does not mean to do it (and even head-butted a door so hurt themselves and not me) but that does not stop the panic attach from being triggered due to my P.T.S.D. caused by childhood… stuff.
Apr. 23rd, 2014 10:51 pm (UTC)
That sucks. Sorry :(
Apr. 23rd, 2014 11:22 pm (UTC)
My first reaction is to just say that life sucks but it doesn't. They did say sorry today, we even had some fun and they did not physically harm me. They are also potentially undiagnosed with a few things themselves and so…

Thank you. ♥
( 4 comments — Leave a comment )
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