NatF @ LiveJournal

Happy Birthday xjenavivex!

When someone says these things to you, it’s not an example of inconsiderate behavior. When your spouse shows up half an hour late to dinner without calling—that’s inconsiderate behavior. A remark intended to shut you down like, “Calm down, you’re overreacting,” after you just addressed someone else’s bad behavior, is emotional manipulation—pure and simple. (sic - US article and spelling)

If you have ever wondered what "gaslighting" means in the context of abuse, relationships and/or mental health, this is a useful article to read.

Why Women Aren’t Crazy — The Good Men Project

I spotted this link on a great, short, no-nonsense post about gaslighting by ysabetwordsmith.

I personally have been the recipient of gaslighting many, many times in my life, from a number of different people. I have also done this myself in the past, before I realised just how wrong and destructive it can be, because this was so much a part of my childhood that I learned that it was just what 'you' do and how 'you' behave. There are a number of things that I have done in my past that I am truly not proud of and truly ashamed of doing and this is one of them.

ETA: I have just realised that I still do this now and then and do not notice that I am doing it. Both online and face-to-face. I need to work on that because I know how destructive it can be to be on the receiving end of gaslighing.

Gaslighting is not clever and it is not nice. It is just. Plain. WRONG.

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In response to the article linked in my previous post:

Yashar Ali’s explosively popular article “Why Women Aren’t Crazy” is out there racking up Facebook shares in the tens of thousands. This tells me its resonating with a lot of women AND men. But, Ali’s article, although valid on some very real levels, tells a limited narrative in a limiting way.

6 Reasons ‘Why Women Aren’t Crazy’ is Only Part of the Story — The Good Men Project( Collapse )