August 23rd, 2011

pixelasleep, sleep

Another unsent letter

This has been bugging me since the 4th. I just need to get it out and then maybe I will stop thinking about it, perseverating and obsessing as this letter runs over and over in my head.

Dear you - yes, you - you know who you are,

I don't know why I bother. I mention that M&S vouchers are of little use to me/us as gifts, that we never shop there except very rarely for underwear and that we have specifically asked for other things in the past (iTunes vouchers, Amazon vouchers, cash, etc.) and you say that we should be grateful that we get anything. We are. We are just trying to let you know that your money would be better spent (and less wasted) on a gift that we will use and actually need.

Just a few minutes later I surprise you with a gift (on my birthday, not yours!) of some socks that I designed for you and knitted for you and all you do is find fault and complain. They don't match (that sometimes happens with self patterning yarn and hand-knit socks - it is part of the charm!). They are slippery on your wooden floor and not like slippers at all (well, that is because they are SOCKS!). *sigh*

Why did I make them for you? Well, you had snarked at me that, "You don't knit ME socks!" after I knitted a pair for my brother's fiancée at giftmas. Well, now you know why. Although you are totally self-centred and oblivious and so you actually have no idea why, in reality.

Do you even hear your double standard? Your 'one rule for us and another for you'? You should (by your earlier words) be grateful that I thought to design them for you and knit them for you! "It is the thought that counts!" you say, over and over from my earliest days whilst the thought is not enough and so does not count, for you. *sigh*

So, even though I keep seeing things on Ravelry that I would love to knit for you and I think you might like, I am not going to knit you anything else unless you specifically ask me, choose the pattern and buy the yarn. I give up.

Relevant memories:
  • The gloves I knitted you out of my last skein of Regia Silk 4ply (discontinued), a yarn I love and thought you would too. Of course, you put them straight in a drawer and never wear them. You tell me they are too thin and not warm enough.

  • SO. I knit you a thicker and warmer pair of gloves. I have a feeling that you never wear those either.

  • I have knit you scarves and shawls and they all live in the same drawer.

I knit things for you to WEAR not to moulder away in a drawer. At least these knit items may return to me one day. Maybe then I can wear them myself or regift them to someone who will appreciate them and WEAR them!

I give up knitting you anything and sure as hell will not design anything for you again in the future.