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Bullies kill.

I have been both bullied and abused in my life. This video rang a lot of bells. Bullies kill. They almost killed me, more than once. I have been bullied recently, online. I am withdrawing from some of my online life as a result.

Source: The Wordsmith's Forge - Watch "To This Day"

I am tempted to do one of those holding-up-cards-instead-of-speaking vlogs (video blogs) that many teenagers seem to be doing. I know I am 45, but I hate my voice when recorded. Then again, I also dislike what I look like (which is part of why I decided not to make a video podcast). I know that these feelings are a result of all those years of being bullied, but I cannot get past those feelings because they reside deep within my soul.

As always, YMMV (your mileage may vary).



Comments

( 4 comments — Leave a comment )
pickleboot
Feb. 22nd, 2013 07:53 am (UTC)
i know i have not commented on your bullying posts because, well, i hate talking about it.

i was a gifted kid in the late 70's and early to mid 80's in the midwestern state of illinois in a major big ten university town. i didn't fit in. i was bullied all the way through high school. i never fit in. i did not wear the right clothes, shoes, carry the right bags or purses, and it was awful. the biggest thing was one day, in high school, i was a junior, so 16, a few members of the football team threw firecrackers at me and my best friend as we were getting ready for first period. had we not been wearing combat boots the fireworks would have blown a few toes off. i had burns up and down my legs, my skirt caught on fire, and another friend grabbed a fire extinguisher to put out the flames that were climbing up my clothing.

the worst part? i got punished for not being able to change out of my winter boots(the combat boots) into the shoes that lived in my locker for the winter months. i almost got suspended until my dean noticed the 2nd and a few 3rd degree burns on my legs and called for an ambulance to help me get my tights off and figure out how bad the damage was. no one was punished, even though we named names because it was playoff time. i gave up after that. it never ended. i still get crap from these people. we are almost 40 and their life is so pathetic that they go after someone who is so content in their life to make them feel better.

know i care about you and would miss you. and you can always talk to me. i still get it now as the token freak mom in town.
natf
Feb. 22nd, 2013 07:20 pm (UTC)
*hugs* and thank you for sharing.
wolfteaparty
Feb. 22nd, 2013 08:04 pm (UTC)
I've always been very self-conscious about being filmed and taped as well, also due to being bullied over my appearance and voice. I used to run from cameras sometimes. I watched that video... very good portrayal of the scars bullying leaves.
natf
Feb. 23rd, 2013 07:28 pm (UTC)
I think my aversion to being photographed and bullied may actually be due to the bullying but I seem to have always been averse to it - well, after age seven or so. Come to think of it, that is when most of the bullying started. *ponders* Maybe doing a vlog or video podcast would be therapeutic and my way to one-in-the-eye the bullies. Lots to ponder.
( 4 comments — Leave a comment )

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