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"My mom gives me the silent treatment."

Oh goodness gracious yes!
#339: My mom gives me the silent treatment. « CaptainAwkward.com

via "Things you aren't allowed to feel." by naamah_darling

"And, consequently, it scares the fucking shit out of me when people are angry around me. When they yell or stomp around or rant or whatever, any of the completely normal (I guess? Because I do not actually know for sure what constitutes "normal" in this context.) emotional venting shit that people do when they are angry and that shouldn't really scare me unless it is directed at me, personally, which it almost never is. It scares me when I think someone might be angry with me. It scares me when I feel hurt or sick or scared and am barely hanging on, and somebody does something that makes me feel alone or unwanted. It scares me pointing things out that upset me, because historically that was a good way to get myself in hot water. It scares me making my own decisions, because I could be making the wrong one, and will not only probably make someone mad, but have to do it alone, or change my mind anyway just to make the anger stop."


I just wrote a long email to my brother in Mailplane (a Mac OSX Gmail client), saved it as a draft, closed the app and then, when I re-ran the app the draft was not there any more. Gutted.



Comments

( 2 comments — Leave a comment )
taibhse_fiach
Sep. 5th, 2012 01:29 pm (UTC)
In my own experience, sad to say, I was grateful for the silent treatment - it meant peace and quiet, except for the way she would bang things around. But yes, it does create its own problems.
wolfteaparty
Sep. 5th, 2012 02:04 pm (UTC)
My mom used to give me the silent treatment when she was upset (and I didn't always know why she was upset). It was extremely painful, especially since my mom was pretty much my only friend during long periods of my life, and she was often a lot of fun when she wasn't upset. It may have something to do with my massive abandonment issues and how nervous I get when people get quiet or seem moody. It helps me feel less alone to read about how damaging silent treatment from parents can be.
( 2 comments — Leave a comment )

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