Nat S Ford (natf) wrote,
Nat S Ford
natf

Copy & paste from my natdaylog Tumblr

<stream_of_conscousness>
I was deep in a complex dream where I understood a lot of physics and was about to fix something that was WRONG in an infinite and multi-dimensional way and was about to mean that none of the timelords had ever existed and so neither had The Doctor in any of his incarnations — and then Smudge woke me up and my feeling of loss is now immense because in the dream I learned that dreams were not only dreams but also windows into those other worlds and dimensions. I was being myself in another possible universe. All of those other mes in all of those other dreams are as real as I am and so the loss that I feel every time that this happens actually makes sense and is completely understandable. There IS a version of me out there somewhere in her alternate universe that can fly by thinking about it and although I know that physics tells us this when you get into quantum superposition and so on, every time I am yanked out of experiencing these things in my dreams my heart breaks a little more because whichever reality I have just experienced is not MY reality.
I went through a phase in the 80s when I was terrified of sleep because I was experiencing serialising and repeating dreams where I would die but not wake up like most people do when they die in a dream. Well, if I keep having THESE serialising and repeating dreams that, instead of waking up terrified I wake up heartbroken, I may have to try to avoid sleep again.
</stream_of_conscousness>

Posted via LiveJournal.app.

Tags: via ljapp
Subscribe
  • Post a new comment

    Error

    default userpic

    Your reply will be screened

    Your IP address will be recorded 

    When you submit the form an invisible reCAPTCHA check will be performed.
    You must follow the Privacy Policy and Google Terms of use.
  • 0 comments