Yeah, not in LJ much, I am afraid, but on paper! I am working through "Creativity Rules! A Writer's Workbook" by John Vorhaus - a book recommended by one of the writers on my FL, rowyn, and I have got back in touch with the younger me that used to either be reading or writing every spare second that I could find. A lot of that older stuff (from age 8 onwards) is archived over at my writing journal, nsf_writing, a journal that was purely private for the longest time and then friends-only but is now almost all public.

Recently (well, for the past fifteen to twenty years, if I am honest!) I have not had the spoons to be able to write, be it a paper journal, poetry or creative writing. I have missed it and, since rediscovering the knack and my muse, I never want to lose it again!

I have had a livejournal post mulling away on my mind for ages about leaving something behind and being remembered for more than one generation (ideally) if anything should ever happen to me. I know that LJ may not be around forever but I do have a permanent account (and I STILL do not know who to thank for that!) and so I am thinking of moving the contents of nsf_writing into this LJ. I would create a 'writings' filter/tag so that only those of you that would be interested would have my ramblings inflicted upon you.

I am also contemplating creating a 'creativity-rules!' filter/tag and trying to get around to transcribe my writings and exercises from that workbook from paper into this LJ.

I have made a discovery today about my writing process. I read part of the workbook and reached a → (which is what the book uses to indicate an exercise). I was in Starbucks after counselling this afternoon and I read the exercise (having already read it and been stumped by it last time I was working through the book) and then put the book down, drank some coffee, listened to conversations around me and knitted. My mind was then able to free-wheel and suddenly I had the answer, or inspiration, or something, and I proceeded to write 2.5 sides of A5 paper (wide lined paper and large, scrawling, messy handwriting) whereas most of the earlier exercises I had only managed a paragraph or so. I am also very pleased with the plot/premise/concpt/I-can't-think-of-the-word. I would like to transcribe it (and no doubt edit it a bit in the process) to my LJ.

Earlier on, in counselling, we talked about letting myself think instead of getting frustrated about not being able to find a word, for example. This word-loss is a symptom of my MonSter. Well, while I was writing I would stop and let my mind go blank rather than trying to force myself to remember the word. I would even leave a blank and come back to it later, or do what I have done above and write alternatives or possible words.

I let myself write. I forgave myself my limitations. I wrote as well as I ever did all those years ago, to be honest! I am REALLY pleased with what I wrote today. I am used to thinking things like, "Yeah, but, the other writers on my FL and that I know IRL would have done a MUCH better job of this - I am so inadequate!" I have always been a perfectionist and have needed to be first and the best. I think, at 41, I am finally learning to let myself be me!

In recent days, since the book arrived, I am finding myself stopping what I am doing and jotting down a paragraph, just like I used to. When I tried to work through "The Artists Way" by Julia Cameron (which is packed in a box somewhere) I found her decree that I write thirty pages every morning very off-putting (although I am now told that I have misremembered - totally likely! - and that is is only three pages - but three pages feels like thirty to me when I can only manage three words some days!). That just does not fit how my creative-mind works.

Another thing about writing and posting it here - I do not hold out a lot of hope of getting published in the current climate and it would be nice to be able to have a paypal tip-jar / donation button on my writings posts (donations/tips would not be compulsory, of course!!) so that, if people think that the post warrants it, they can bung me a quid (or fifty! LOL). There are a number of people on my FL that use this business-model and they sometimes manage to pay a bill or two, which would be nice. Even if all I do is raise some pocket-money, it can't hurt, can it? Examples:
shadesong, e.g. this post.
kinokofry, e.g. this post which takes donations for charity.
alexandraerin, e.g. this post and her website.
Annoyingly, I cannot remember who the other LJFriend(s) is/are that do this - I was sure there were more! ☹

I could even add such a button to my photo posts, I guess! Hmmmm. *thinks* That might even get me to post more photos - including some of the thousands that only exist on DVD-Rs and have not even made it to flickr yet!

So, I finally come to the main reason for this post, other than to brain-dump some of my thoughts - the poll:



Any other comments? Anything I have missed?